We offer a wide variety of Hubbist programming to fit your cult needs:

Hubtisms  |  Hubmitzvahs  |  Hub Exorcisms  |  Hub Weddings



Are you looking to dip your little tike into an ice cold glass of pink lemonade? Yeah, we thought so. No better way to protect your little fella from Zlinky and the evils of the Port Authority Bus Terminal than to dunk ’em early on in life into that sugary goodness. Then we can all sit back and relax and say, “Ahhhh!”



Hubmitzvahs are the ultimate celebration of Hubbitst religion. They are the celebration of your little Hubbists coming of age! A party to best all other party’s!

Your child’s hubmitzvah will be held at the age of 13, and will be a very memorable experience. There will be , among other things, Dancing, Pink Lemonade, Food, Pink Lemonade, Music, Pink Lemonade, and more!


Hub Exorcisms

Is the evil Zlinky and his Port Authority cronies troubling your soul? What? You don’t even have a soul? Well, we’re here to help you with your exorcism (Results may vary, savior of your soul not guaranteed).


Hub Weddings

Let our Holy Bubblies perform your Hub wedding. We have years of experience unifying people in the joyous process of matrimony, whether they wanted to be or not (rope and gags not included).